As 2023 draws to an end, we at The Reality Register wanted to take a look forward to the coming year. We tried to get the most powerful clairvoyant on Earth, Edgar Silva, but as he was tied up with other projects, we got the next best thing. Lady Bacon, the celebrated psychic extraordinaire, has unveiled her top ten prognostications for 2024. Brace yourselves, as we journey into the realm of Lady Bacon’s mystical foresight.
- Alien Diplomacy Takes Center Stage: Lady Bacon predicts that 2024 will mark the beginning of official contact with extraterrestrial beings. Governments worldwide will scramble to establish diplomatic relations with intergalactic visitors, ushering in a new era of cosmic cooperation.
- Presidential Surprise: Hold onto your crystal balls, as Lady Bacon foresees an unexpected twist in the U.S. Presidential election. A dark horse candidate, known for their unconventional approach and surprising background, will emerge victorious, leaving the political pundits baffled and the nation abuzz.
- Economic Downturn Looms: Lady Bacon warns of economic turbulence on the horizon. A global downturn will shake financial markets, prompting governments to implement drastic measures to stabilize economies. Brace yourselves for a rollercoaster ride in the world of finance.
- Kraken Resurfaces with New Evidence: The mythical sea creature, the Kraken, will capture the world’s attention as new evidence emerges, suggesting its existence. Cryptid enthusiasts and marine biologists alike will be drawn into a renewed quest to uncover the secrets lurking in the ocean depths.
- Asteroid’s Near Miss: Fear not, doomsday prophets, for Lady Bacon predicts that Earth will narrowly escape a catastrophic collision with an asteroid. The celestial visitor will graze our atmosphere, serving as a cosmic wake-up call for space agencies to enhance planetary defense measures.
- Super Bowl Spectacle: Sports fans, prepare for a showdown like no other! Lady Bacon predicts that an underdog team will emerge victorious in the Super Bowl, stunning viewers and rewriting the sports history books.
- The Simpsons Saga Ends: In a revelation that will leave fans in mourning, Lady Bacon predicts the cancellation of the long-running animated series, “The Simpsons.” The iconic yellow family’s adventures will come to an end, marking the conclusion of an era in television history.
- Cryptocurrency Surprises: Crypto enthusiasts, be prepared for a wild ride! Lady Bacon foresees unexpected twists and turns in the world of cryptocurrency, with new digital currencies rising to prominence and others facing unforeseen challenges.
- Celebrity UFO Sightings: In a series of bizarre encounters, Lady Bacon predicts that several A-list celebrities will report personal sightings of unidentified flying objects. These close encounters will predate the official announcement of contact with extraterrestrial beings, and captivate the public’s imagination, sparking a new wave of UFO enthusiasts among the Hollywood elite.
- Breakthrough in Renewable Energy: Amidst the chaos, Lady Bacon offers a glimmer of hope as she predicts a groundbreaking discovery in renewable energy. A technological marvel will revolutionize the way we harness power, providing a beacon of light in the fight against climate change.
As we embark on the journey that is 2024, Lady Bacon’s predictions leave us both mystified and intrigued. Will her foresight prove accurate, or will the twists and turns of the coming year defy the cosmic predictions? Only time will tell, but one thing is certain – 2024 is set to be a year of unprecedented surprises, both worldly and otherworldly. Have the happiest of New Years!
Jacob Bartholomew
