Salut, les amis! Mars and Uranus are combining forces to make things wild this week. Under
Mars, we can all get more done, but may become aggressive. Uranus may bring out our
independence and a desire to do or say shocking things. Be aware of your emotional state
when performing dangerous actions.
The Grey January 1 – January 29:
Use that Uranus energy to explore a planet you have put off visiting. Mars in your house of war
and food consumption may make you more likely to win the upcoming battle for Celestia, but
may also make you a chub.
Etsai January 30 – February 27:
Stick to low calorie grasses this week. Mars is making you ravenous. Uranus is telling you to try
new things. This combination may make you feel hungry when you have just eaten and
desirous of strange flavor combinations.
Doppelgänger February 28 – March 27:
This week the energy will shift and switch between you and your twin. For one week, you will
be the bad guy and they will be the good one. It will be confusing for everyone who knows you.
Sandwalker March 28 – April 25:
If they have gone flaky on you it is time to reconsider whether they even deserve your attention.
No call, no text, no contact? Tell them to go blow. Mars is working in your favor to make you
aloof in this dynamic. You have had a squishy heart for way too long!
Sasquatch April 26 – May 24:
Finally, Sasquatch gets a break from the anger rollercoaster. Mars and Uranus balance the
energies in your system this week, making you the gentle, loving critter you always knew you
could be.
Chupacabra May 25 – June 22:
Mysteries abound. No one knows who you are this week. Anonymity can be a gift. A mono-diet
may help you control your urges a bit so only eat buckskin goats this week.
Lusca June 23 – July 21:
You will have a mild week. Lucky you. Everyone else is undergoing erratic energy.
Centaur July 22 – August 19:
Uranus is making you the butt of everyone else’s jokes. No pun intended. Watch the effect
Mars has on you. Try not to blow your friendships up over a few misguided quips.
Goatman August 20 – September 17:
Mars and Uranus are having a stranger effect on you than others in the ‘tid kingdom. Where
everyone else is feeling more social or agitated, you just want to read a book. Pick up a juicy
romance or mystery novel this week.
Frogman September 18 – October 16:
Last week Froggy was hiding in the shadows, this week finds them taking the stage at a local
karaoke bar. Mars and Uranus are making you brash and unafraid. Please do us all a favor and
sing something other than “I Love Rock ’n Roll” by Joan Jett. Try something new – maybe something by Tom Waits or Nick Cave. My advice: “The Piano Has Been Drinking” or “People
Just Ain’t No Good.”
The Loch Ness Monster October 17 – November 7:
You thought you had something with that one. Nah, Nessie. Champy never could match your
style and class. Besides, he was a cheapskate. Allow Mars to guide your vocal cords and tell
that loser to hit the road.
Beast of Exmoor November 8 – December 6:
You are no stranger to feline rage. Let Uranus take that to a creative level – spitefully scratch
the best sofa you can find or “forget” to cover up in the litter box. Try begging for kibbles and
turning your nose up to what is offered. Fun times!
Mermaid December 7 – December 31:
The ocean tides – usually under the Moon’s control – switch power to Mars. They will be rough
and violent, but the stirring waves make even the most boring kelp delicious. Snack away. Kelp
is packed with beneficial oils and vitamins.
Together, we can all make it through the Mars-Uranus conjunction in one piece. Try to be kind
and diplomatic when dealing with others. Drive the speed limit – avoid danger. We can all get
through this together.
Love to all!
Lady Bacon
