STALLONE IS OVER: Has-Been Actor Commits Unforgivable Sin, Describes Someone’s Appearance
ATLANTA – Sylvester Stallone has been accused by disgruntled former coworkers of toxic behavior on the set of a show…
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BIGFOOT’S BEST FRIEND? Disc Golfer Rescues Neglected SquatchDog, Plans To Smoke Up Bigfoot
PLAINVILLE – In the realm of cryptids and urban legends, few creatures capture the imagination quite like Bigfoot. But what…
FLORIDA MAN TELLS ALL: How A Midair Collision Seeded The Everglades With Invasive Species, Including The PandaSquatch
EVERGLADES – In the dense, murky depths of the Florida Everglades, where the air is thick with humidity and the…
THE WENDIGO’S STAR IS RISING AS NFL DRAFT APPROACHES
DEVIL’S LAKE, ND – Devil’s Lake State College of Mining and Thaumatology’s star right guard, The Wendigo, is now being…
WASTE NOT: Simulation Cultist Pledges To Live A Boring Life To Conserve The Hardware Running REALITY.EXE
CAMBRIDGE – In the realm of baseless convictions, few are as captivating as the theory that reality itself is nothing…
PSIZZLIN’ WITH LADY BACON: Your Weekly Cryptid Horoscope for the Week of April 8 – 14
Salut, les amis! Spring has sprung! The warm breezes have returned, forcing out the sleepy cold of Winter. Forest animals…
REALITY RUMORS: AI Ghosts, A Tech Guy Is Toast, And Inside Trading From The Coast
In the dimly lit corridors of power and intrigue, whispers of clandestine dealings and hidden agendas echo. Welcome, reality readers,…
CURIOUS COOKING: Unleash Your Wild Side With Bigfoot-Long Hot Dogs
In the realm of culinary creations, there are few dishes as enigmatic and intriguing as the Bigfoot-Long Hotdog. Named after…
SINCLAIR MOVIE REVIEW: “Monkey Man” Fails to Deliver Monkeymen – Shaky Camera And Boring Plot Spoils Awesome Title
The Reality Register has long been known for the most accurate, stringent book reviews available online, but movies have thus…
COSMIC COSTUME CAPERS: Thieving Grey Aliens Use Increasingly Elaborate Disguises to Gain Entry to Homes
Across the country, reports are flooding in of grey aliens donning increasingly elaborate disguises to gain entry into homes through…