FLORIDA MAN TELLS ALL: How A Midair Collision Seeded The Everglades With Invasive Species, Including The PandaSquatch
EVERGLADES – In the dense, murky depths of the Florida Everglades, where the air is thick with humidity and the…
THE WENDIGO’S STAR IS RISING AS NFL DRAFT APPROACHES
DEVIL’S LAKE, ND – Devil’s Lake State College of Mining and Thaumatology’s star right guard, The Wendigo, is now being…
WASTE NOT: Simulation Cultist Pledges To Live A Boring Life To Conserve The Hardware Running REALITY.EXE
CAMBRIDGE – In the realm of baseless convictions, few are as captivating as the theory that reality itself is nothing…
PSIZZLIN’ WITH LADY BACON: Your Weekly Cryptid Horoscope for the Week of April 8 – 14
Salut, les amis! Spring has sprung! The warm breezes have returned, forcing out the sleepy cold of Winter. Forest animals…
REALITY RUMORS: AI Ghosts, A Tech Guy Is Toast, And Inside Trading From The Coast
In the dimly lit corridors of power and intrigue, whispers of clandestine dealings and hidden agendas echo. Welcome, reality readers,…
CURIOUS COOKING: Unleash Your Wild Side With Bigfoot-Long Hot Dogs
In the realm of culinary creations, there are few dishes as enigmatic and intriguing as the Bigfoot-Long Hotdog. Named after…
HIRAM RISING: Bring On The Apoc-eclipse! Why I Am Excited For The Post-Apocalyptic World That Will Follow Monday’s Eclipse
As the total eclipse scheduled for Monday across much of the United States and Canada quickly approaches, many are captivated…
SINCLAIR MOVIE REVIEW: “Monkey Man” Fails to Deliver Monkeymen – Shaky Camera And Boring Plot Spoils Awesome Title
The Reality Register has long been known for the most accurate, stringent book reviews available online, but movies have thus…
GNOME-MORE GMADNESS! As Gnomes Are Featured in More and More Holiday Decorations, Gnomes Everywhere are Wondering Why
In the days following Easter, a young gnome ventured into the post-Easter clearance section of a local walmart. Like most…
COSMIC COSTUME CAPERS: Thieving Grey Aliens Use Increasingly Elaborate Disguises to Gain Entry to Homes
Across the country, reports are flooding in of grey aliens donning increasingly elaborate disguises to gain entry into homes through…